The How-To's
by AagwaMiyusu
Summary: Only when thy were well into the highway the girls realized that they climbed into a huge bullet-proof monster truck with a dude cosplaying Darth Vader and more dudes who looked like Darth Vader's copies except a bit smaller and cape-less. And they were holding guns. What the FUCK! Language, lime, alternate universe, OCs and weird-ass dreams guaranteed.
1. Break Out

**Break Out**

* * *

"We're gonna do it,"

"I don't want to do,"

"You're doing this, shut up. You promised,"

"Yes, but someone catch us then?"

"They won't, now come let's get ready already,"

"He'll be alone,"

"His fault for making you suffer,"

"But-"

"No turning back. Look, we made it this far without getting caught, he'll call you now and we'll go according to plan, right?"

"Yes…"

"Good, now wait for it-"

A deep voice interrupted with a name. Right on time.

A string of elegant words flew out of the fore-called person's mouth in reply. Immediately there was a creaking of a door and footsteps, one running to the caller while the other walked out like a thief, quiet and sure not to alert anyone of her presence.

The called person talked in her language, dulcet tones drowning the other one's noise as she bowed low and exited the curtained room. Walking to the kitchen, she motioned the other girl to follow. Quietly, despite carrying a rolled up make-shift ladder, she tip-toed across the carpeted room.

Even in the kitchen they spoke in whispers, afraid that somebody might be dropping in on them. They looked around with shifty eyes and opened the small balcony connected, entering it cautiously. After looking out for a while, they shut the door behind them.

They stared at the bright sky up ahead.

Then looked down five floors below. This would be difficult but not impossible.

Tying the ladder safely to the railing, she pulled it hard, testing the knot she had made.

"Dude, go,"

"No, you go-" Her accented English stopped midway as the other interrupted.

"Dude!"

"Okay," And with that, 'dude' grabbed hold of the rope and climbed over the railing, careful not to look below as she started downwards. With her, the other one followed suite, counting the floors as she slowly descended.

After a few minutes of whisper-yelling and face-butt planting, they reached the second floor. They climbed into the respective balcony and quickly ran inside the open door. Rushing to grab the few things they were taking along, one grabbed their backpacks and iPods, while the other shut the door and locked it secure.

After a few minutes of silence and a complete change of wardrobe, they ran out the front door, shutting it close and hiding the key under the welcome mat where it was supposed to be.

An exhale of relief ran out their throats; but it wasn't over yet. One pulled the red hood on her head, the face shadowed completely as the other grabbed the purple scarf and made a quick cover of her face with it.

Hand in hand, they exited the building and walked towards the street, not looking back at what the future they had left behind.

As they waited to cross the street, they noticed a peculiar man standing near them. They crossed the road; he crossed as well. And what luck, he was going for the BPT that was parked right over at the other side of the two roads. That too at a civilian district! This was rare, but they'd never get any other chance like this one. No one would even suspect the dude of carrying two girls, give or take that they check his ride. Which was a big nada.

Testing their sudden luck, they followed him and asked him for a hitch-hike. He nodded once and the girls nodded back as well.

As they climbed inside the car, they found two men, one at the front and one at the back, immediately shifting far away from them. They sat a bit too civilized, from their positions sprawled all over the seat to being perfect angels in the perfect posture and pose. The girls decided to sit beside them as well, one at the front and one at the back as well. The 'car' started with a thunderous roar and instantly cars stopped on the road to make way for the BPT.

Only when thy were well into the highway the girls realized that they climbed into a huge bullet-proof monster truck with a dude cosplaying Darth Vader and more dudes who looked like Darth Vader's copies except a bit smaller and cape-less.

And they were holding guns.

What the FUCK?!

* * *

**Yes, randomness is our especial. **Don't mind the OC's. And well, first story that is mainly about the OC's. And first story tagged mature. o-o

All will be explained in due time.

**PS: Tell us whether it's good enough to continue or not. :3 Enjoy :D**

**PPS: It's an AU. **


	2. Kitty x2 Bang x2

**Kitty x2 Bang x2**

* * *

Fennez stared forward, watching the cars pave way for the badass BPT and counted the minutes they still had before being caught by any force. She could only hope that the two…minions weren't police official or something; they'd be caught and taken back to hell before they could even fucking cough.

She prayed like an ass that they were just thugs from the freaking streets or something.

Heck even hobos were perfectly fine.

She started regretting her decision. If they were caught, it would be no problem for Fennez. She'd be home as if nothing had happened; like she was only out for some day-long walk in the park or something.

But her pal? She'd probably be killed or sacrificed for some weird appeasing the family name shit because she disgraced it, back at her fucked up place. Give or take whether the bastard found out or not. Yet. She let a sigh out. Then looked at the dude sitting beside her. And fucking sighed again. Damn, she still couldn't make heads or tails of how he looked _exactly_. Fucking mask!

* * *

Snaha stared at the…dude. She doubted whether it was a dude, but he didn't have boobs so it was a man. Sure she heard of cosplayers, but seriously she didn't expect to see one. That too in a car. Fennez said that people wore it in conventions and stuffs.

She knew that but really, like Fennez would say; fuck that gun looked real. And she was sure those were illegal. Unless they really were bodyguards of the police type. Well, at least there still hasn't been a report of two civilians on the run and last seen climbing into an unmarked BPT. Haha. Ha.

Snaha stared at the other one beside him, driving the huge monster with finesse and skill. Wasn't easy driving an 8 foot black beauty like it was an easy piece of cake. He was taller, that's for sure, but well-proportioned as well. She knew nothing else about him but didn't dwell on it for long. She had better things to worry about than his face.

Like whether they were being taken to a Darth Vader cult or not. Or whether they would be sexually assaulted, raped and maybe dumped in the nearby desert where they'd be eaten by vultures or little scorpions. Etc.

She let out a breath of exasperation; Fenny would do something about it though. She always does.

* * *

_This is awkward_, FAAZ thought. What the hell was Strike thinking? Was he thinking of, like, selling them or some shit? Cheap ass. FAAZ wasn't gonna allow that! If it came down to it, he'd knock some sense into the bastard's head and make sure those girls were back home.

He still didn't understand how he got them to enter the BPT willfully. And even if they did, how did they get the courage to ask for a ride?! What if the goddamn President had sat in the back seat instead of him? And shit, weren't they afraid of the consequences? They had guns, hell! Guns! What would their parents say if they found out that they were pretty much kidnapped by strangers wielding guns!? It wasn't the same thing as just being kidnapped!

Guns turned the whole thing into hostage-taking, not kidnapping! The heck it did! And SICU has no issues with the situation. The stupid idiot!

Oh damn, damn, _damn_!

What's worse, the red-head beside him was trying to look at his face. Damn. He just stared forward as the scenery slowly changed from highways to buildings, from food joints to malls and from the scattered buildings to the growing savanna vegetation. It was evening already, damnit! Well, no need to encourage her little mission of face-seeing anymore than needed. She was encouraged enough by the mask, he supposed.

* * *

SICU was feeling weird. Like having a girl beside him wasn't enough, now he was a bit _too_ close to Strike's personal bubble. He felt weird.

He just kept folding and unfolding his arms.

_Come on you ass-hat, talk and spout nonsense like you always do_, SICU thought with a sigh. Damn it felt like a riot. Smooth FAAZ, real smooth. Just get over the goddamn chick and start blabbering already, please. He sighed again.

The girls… Why Strike, _why_? Couldn't he have just said 'no'? Just a simple no? Jeez, he just hoped Strike got a good reason; if it was something degrading, FAAZ would just skewer him. He was scary when he wanted to be.

And look at that girl beside him, all shy and cool. Wasn't she a charmer in parties? He coughed; as if he was. He just rested his head on the chin as he looked at the stupid savanna. He hated this region. Goddamn lions roamed over here. And the giraffes. Damn, one of the creatures even poked their tongue in his ear for goodness sake! It was like, having FAAZ's drool in his _ear_. Jeez. Now he was fidgeting.

It was night.

_Get the girls out of here, Strike, we have nothing to do with them_, SICU thought. They have nothing to do with us, either.

SICU didn't want them to mingle with their screwed up lives. It's weird enough that they-

Is that a _cop_ in the distance?! The hell?! Shiii-

* * *

The BPT, already at a breakneck speed, skidded to a sudden stop as the occupants crashed forward and hit the respective barriers. Poor Strike. He hit his head on the steering wheel.

After a few minutes of cussing and cursing they opened their eyes to find a police officer walk towards the truck, a talkie in hand and a flashlight in another since it was really dark. They gulped; officers do not travel miles away from city limits only to check out a BPT in the middle of the fucking savanna.

"What do we do?" Fennez asked, already diving under the passenger seat for cover. Snaha was busy hyperventilating. Thank God the scarf was still in place; the dude would've recognized her right away, otherwise. She knew this was a bad idea!

"We wait," The driver said as he spoke for the first time. Fennez didn't find it hard to believe despite that they were gonna be arrested as well for assisting/kidnapping two youths. He sounded like he had a plan. Besides, his voice was sexy enough to believe.

Two gasps echoed as the police dude knocked on the side of the door.

"FAAZ, SICU, it's the fail-safe plan,"

"Wait, what-" And they were off before anyone could react, the truck speeding from 0 to 100 in seconds. The whiplash kicked the girls back into their seats as the badass BPT mashed through the parked car.

"What the fucking hell in the name of Heaven was that?! We're so fucking dead! Holy shit, go faster! _Faster_! Car chase, woohoo!" Fennez shouted, jumping in her seat as Snaha struggled to stay still on hers. She was screaming alright. What the hell?!

They could already hear the various distorted woo-woo's outside as voices requested for surrender. Police? Damn. And yes, seriously requested because nobody would like to be mashed like that poor car behind them.

"FAAZ, gimme a head count," And immediately the back bencher squeezed out as Fennez made place for the dude. He opened the small sort-of door and hopped out to the truck's cargo loading area.

"Damnit…" FAAZ muttered as he saw the numbers. About twenty cops on bikes and at least two cars at the rear, from what he could see anyways. "Strike, it's like flies attracted to dog shit. What do we do?"

"Drive away like bitches!"

"Will you mind? I'm trying to drive over here, ma'am,"

"Sorry… RUN AWAY LIKE FUCKED BITCHES!"

"Shoot,"

"The fuck, Strike?"

"Shooting? Sex!" And with that, somebody stumbled into the big area, staring at the high walls bounding the dock.

"Woah, high walls. Nice," And with that, she positioned herself with the rifle on the raised platform. _His_ rifle! The idiot!

"Sex? Wait, _my_ rifle!"

"Cause there's no 'Y' when it comes to sexiness," The goddamn red-head said it like she was the boss, obviously ignoring his statement. Does she even know how to shoot?!

**BANG**

Um, yes, she does know apparently. FAAZ sighed, opened the compartment below his foot and took out another rifle for himself. He stood on the platform beside her and aimed at the followers. Heh. Hehehe. He shot and hit a tire, immediately the bike tumbling into another. He watched the Domino effect take place.

**BANG**

_Amateur_.

"Not my fault I've never held a gun, asshole,"

"Then how do you even know where's the trigger?"

"Movies,"

"Harhar,"

**BANG**

"Doesn't your aim seem to suck now?"

"Fuck off,"

"Open fire!"

"Holy shit, duck!"

And both the cosplayer and red-head dived under the cover, the bullets peppering the BPT AKA still very bullet-proofed truck.

"Fuck!"

"You're the one who shot first,"

"You aren't helping the situation, asshole,"

* * *

Under siege by police. Whoopee, high as it gets. Why? Simply because it's a minister's daughter, as it would seem.

**PS: Enjoy, read and reviews, plz ;_; And yes, the three are under codenames, explained in due time. **


End file.
